Today, I went to my myspace page and revisted old blogs. Usually they are about relationship issues, romance, or random moments where I needed to vent about life in general.
Lately, I've been so stressed with school and life in general that I forgot how excited I was when I realized I wanted to be a Special Education teacher. It seems everywhere I go, and the people that I meet are negative about their lives as teachers and I hear complaint after complaint. Since I am not a teacher right now, I have no students of my own that inspire me, the stories of "my students" are not "mine" and I forgot how fun it was to teach everyday. How every morning when my students walked into homeroom a new adventure began.
When I read my blogs I reminded myself of how much I love my kiddos and how much I looked forward to my daily stories. I found a blog where I decided I want to be an Education Specialist and teach students with special needs. I was SO PSYCHED!
August... is the month. I should be done by then. I pray to God I can find a job and the inspiration will begin again.
Right now, I breathe and try to look forward. I know the finish line is out there, but I have to get over this hill to reach it. Credential, why are you taking so long?
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Missing the Milestones
As you all know I was teaching at a middle school, and I loved it. I love kids at that age. They are wanna-be-adults which make them easy to handle. If they give you a hard time or they're having difficult day, the students are with you for an hour or two, and then they are off to see their next teacher. They understand sarcasm, figurative language, and are basically fun people to talk to.
I am currently doing a round of student teaching in a third/fourth grade combo. I've worked with this age group before, but never in a Special Day Class setting. Which basically means that the kids are in a Special Education class for most, if not all of the day. I think there is one student in that class that attends a General Education class for 1/2 of the day. Needless to say, that when you get enough students with special needs in a small room dying to get your attention, it can get frustrating.
Across the way is the K-2 Special Day Class where you can hear kids screaming. That frightens me a bit. To think that some people get paid to live in that kind of chaos and do nothing to fix it.
However, I admire those individuals who teach elementary school. There is something so wonderful about an adult willing to spend so much time in a room with the same small children.
Don't get me wrong, I love elementary school, but I miss my middle schoolers more than ever right now. I miss Marck and his little sayings; "Ms. Zaldivar that's colder than the other side of the pillow." I miss arguing with my twin girls and telling them they are capable of much more than they think right now. I miss Andy, who would drive me to the point of lunacy because he was a likable, attention-sucking, seventh grader. I miss my 8th grade class that seem to drop from heaven, where everyone worked hard and tried their best every time. I miss Rudy and her messy backpack and phoning her mother when she had work to complete in English, but chose to not do it. Most of all, I miss seeing their successes. I'm missing all of these end of the year milestones and breakthroughs.
I know I am not getting my old job back, because apparently Harvard won out this time, but I know that I like this age group.
Crazy thing is... my next group of kids are most likely going be in a lower grade. =) Wish me luck with the babies.
I am currently doing a round of student teaching in a third/fourth grade combo. I've worked with this age group before, but never in a Special Day Class setting. Which basically means that the kids are in a Special Education class for most, if not all of the day. I think there is one student in that class that attends a General Education class for 1/2 of the day. Needless to say, that when you get enough students with special needs in a small room dying to get your attention, it can get frustrating.
Across the way is the K-2 Special Day Class where you can hear kids screaming. That frightens me a bit. To think that some people get paid to live in that kind of chaos and do nothing to fix it.
However, I admire those individuals who teach elementary school. There is something so wonderful about an adult willing to spend so much time in a room with the same small children.
Don't get me wrong, I love elementary school, but I miss my middle schoolers more than ever right now. I miss Marck and his little sayings; "Ms. Zaldivar that's colder than the other side of the pillow." I miss arguing with my twin girls and telling them they are capable of much more than they think right now. I miss Andy, who would drive me to the point of lunacy because he was a likable, attention-sucking, seventh grader. I miss my 8th grade class that seem to drop from heaven, where everyone worked hard and tried their best every time. I miss Rudy and her messy backpack and phoning her mother when she had work to complete in English, but chose to not do it. Most of all, I miss seeing their successes. I'm missing all of these end of the year milestones and breakthroughs.
I know I am not getting my old job back, because apparently Harvard won out this time, but I know that I like this age group.
Crazy thing is... my next group of kids are most likely going be in a lower grade. =) Wish me luck with the babies.
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